When my daughter was around 5 and heavily into the card making phase. I once got one with a cute drawing and a message that read ‘I will love you even when you’re dead’
My reaction was torn between awww so cute and OMG does she want me gone already ?
This card came to my mind recently when my friend’s 4 year old told her ‘Mama I will miss you so much when you die’.
Strangely enough, many friends had similar equally emotional yet morbid stories to tell about their children.
So I googled it, and sure enough there were several articles that spoke about how kids aged 4 and 5 years have this strange affinity towards death and talking about it as part of normal conversation. It was even called a ‘normal stage of development’ in kids. Who knew?
So how do we address it ? I’d say first and foremost they need acknowledgement. That yes you are saying this and I hear it. Now let’s see what we can do about it. Understand what your child themselves know about the statement they made. Ask them what they know about death. Be open to questions and be ready with the age appropriate language and apt terms to explain it to them. We can tell them that death is certain but we never know when. And after death we will be reunited in Jannah In Sha Allah so that should give us hope. We could also try to talk about what to do after someone dies. Make Dua for them, give charity. And if you feel sad the best thing to do is to get closer to Allah SWT.
May Allah SWT keep our little ones protected today and always.
P.S Have you had similar experiences ?